“Do you think we should get the police?”
“And say what?”
“We think the neighbour might be being killed!”
“I wish we knew what the safe word was!”
“It’s definitely not ‘stop’ is it! Christ, she’s been screaming that all night! What the hell is he doing to her?”
“Electrocuting her with nipple clamps, must be, it’s some weird shit, no one makes this much noise!”
“I’m waiting for Peter to come back from the toilet.”
“Blimey, it’s early for Pete, he’s usually at 11:30”
“I’ll combust if I don’t shit by twelve.”
“Eurgh, look, someone combusted in a Tesco bag!!”
“Oh for Pete’s sake!”
“If you disturb me again, if you come into my bedroom again, I will behead you with your own sword!”
“No, no, no come back. You can’t leave this party, I forbid you! You can’t leave come back! Don’t leave me with my wife! …. Oh this is just not on!”
ohdearleah 